Oh - to be a clown!

At the End of the Year Performance (this year on June 12), every class puts on a little demonstration of what they learned during the past year. Hopefully you can see how much fun we had from the pictures!

A St. Patrick's Day Skit

On the Sunday closest to the feasts of Saint Patrick (March 17) and Saint Joseph (March 19) we hold one of our annual entertainments (programs). These variety shows, which always rely heavily on the school children, are videotaped and available on DVD through the Saint Benedict Center Bookstore. Here are some pictures (better late than never!).

Father Jarecki (in 2001)

Father Michael Jarecki, a retired priest of the diocese of Ogdensburg, NY, who said Mass for us for more than thirty years, said his last public Mass on October 31, 2010 — the Feast of Christ the King. On the following Sunday, November 7, we held a “Father Jarecki Appreciation Day”. Each classroom made a presentation, and then individuals from the community shared stories and anecdotes  and expressed their gratitude for all that Father has done for us.

IHM High School 2010-2011

Our high school, knowing that Father’s favorite poem was Joyce Kilmer’s Trees, wrote their own poem in appreciation. To read that poem and see pictures from Father’s last public Mass, please keep reading.

PRIESTS

by the IHM High School Class 2010-2011

To Father Michael Jarecki

upon his retirement at the age of ninety-three

I think that I shall never see

A priest as child-like as he.

He baptized, married, and confessed

For sixty-six years without a rest.

As promised to our father* then,

[*Father Leonard Feeney]

For thirty years our priest he’s been.

Those twenty-seven thousand Masses

Were said to God for our trespasses.

For thirty years he gave us hope

And kept us praying for the Pope.

Remembered long by many persons

Will be his short and Marian sermons.

His love for Mary, as a devoted son,

He shared until his job was done.

In spite of sundry aches and pains,

His perseverance made great gains.

He fed us daily with Our Lord;

He taught us Math has its reward.

Through all our laughter and our tears,

He’s been our father for many years.

Poems are made by fools, at least,

But only God can make a priest.

Step back into the past with a one-of-a-kind, old-fashioned family festival: the eighth annual Blueberry Fiddle Festival, organized by Richmond’s Immaculate Heart of Mary School. Admission is FREE; parking is a one-time $5. Enjoy live music and delicious food, browse the craft vendors (it’s a good time to think about presents for this coming year), run a sack race, participate in an original New England melodrama, cheer for your favorite fiddler (the contestants are judged partially on audience response!), and join us for a family contra dance.  Lots of fun for all ages!

The festival is held at Cheshire Fairgrounds (Route 12, Swanzey, NH) on Saturday, August 14, 9am-9pm. For more information, visit blueberryfiddlefestival.com or call 603-239-6495.

John Peter Michael McCann

[John is the youngest of ten. In his speech he will tell you about his educational struggles -- but his perseverance paid off during his senior year. Not only was he no longer "at the bottom of the class," he made Honor Roll twice (and Honorable Mention in this year's final average) -- with a cumulative GPA of 3.0. Congratulations, John!]

Good afternoon, Br. Andre Marie, Sister Marie Therese, Sister Maria Philomena, Dr. Fahey, Dad, Mom, and all my family and friends. Thank you all for coming here to support me during this event celebrating a very important milestone of my life.

Graduation is an event that allows a student to look back and reflect on the journey he or she experienced during the schooling process. When I was analyzing my journey, I discovered certain elements, virtues, and emotions that I wanted to discuss.

Progress: (Advancement toward one’s goals, to develop or improve)

I never had an easy time with learning. I started off having to take kindergarten twice. When my parents realized that public schools were a danger to my spiritual well-being, my mother home-schooled me. I don’t blame her for my inability to learn; it was just there, and during those years of home schooling I fell behind . . . Really badly! My mother was able to school me herself for three years — until her life got complicated and she was forced to put me in a public school for the last quarter of that year. The board of directors decided to place me at a fifth grade level, accompanied by “special classes”. I couldn’t read or spell to save my life.

So, when I moved to NH, I was just a bit behind.

John studies his catechism

When I tested for Immaculate Heart of Mary School, I was at a second grader’s level. I knew about as much as your average seven-year-old. Now, I was twelve at the time, mind you. So, the Sisters put me in fourth grade. For a twelve-year-old to be told he is going to have to go to fourth grade — after he just completed his fifth grade — is pretty hard to take.

Christmas Play (John is the tall shepherd)

To add insult to injury, I was always the one who was behind. Every one else understood things quicker, got better grades, and beat me in the classroom competitions time and time again. This seemed like the common theme of my I.H.M. experience (barring my Senior year). But during these years of strenuous progression, I have received quite an education. I now have an understanding of Algebra, Grammar, Geometry, Church History, Physics, Chemistry, Biology, Latin, Rhetoric, American History, Literature, Trigonometry, Logic; I think you get the point!

All Saints' Day

So in short, this school has not only taught me an amazing amount of useful knowledge, but it also taught me to take difficulties and use them to improve myself giving me a stronger character.

Perseverance: (Steadfastness in doing something despite difficulty or delay in achieving success)

Aside from being older then other students, I wasn’t able to get good grades. I tried my hardest — only to barely pass with less than average grades. But I did learn . . . slowly and painfully . . . but I did learn.

John, Clare, and Rose (seventh grade) in "Esther"

One of the things I learned was simple math. If I’m in fourth grade now… by the time I get to twelfth grade I should be . . . twenty! Aren’t people usually seventeen when they graduate? Ooooooh boy!  I did skip sixth grade, but I knew going into ninth grade that there was no longer any hope of skipping grades (due to the necessity of acquiring a certain amount of credits).

The McCann cleaning gene is showing up

Year after year of struggling as hard as I could, I continued to get very undesirable grades. I would always try and analyze my way out, for instance: “This couldn’t possibly be what God wanted me to suffer.” Eventually, I was fed up with it. (I was eighteen at the time.) It was the beginning of my junior year; I made up my mind to drop out. I was telling myself things, like: “There is always the G.E.D . . .  It’s not like I was throwing my life away. It seems to work out for other people. I am being responsible. I have a plain a plan. I going to get my G.E.D. and become an electrician’s apprentice in South Dakota. I’m just not meant to be in school any more.” (There was a girl in SD, of course; that made the matter all that much more urgent.)

On the USS Cassen Young

So, I told Sister Maria Philomena, in a very matter-of-fact way, that I wasn’t going to finish that year. She sent me to Sister Marie Therese.

Sister Marie Therese listened to what I had to say. She treated me like an adult, and gave me some good advice, and said she would respect my decision if it were well thought out. This was the catalyst that made me follow her advice to go on a retreat. I wanted everyone to respect my decision, and what better way was there than convincing everyone that it was God’s will? (Because, I already convinced myself of this, you see.) On retreat, I discovered that everyone else was right and I was wrong . . . what do you know! Reassured that what I was doing was good and profitable, I made a firm resolution to finish what I started; and, I haven’t looked back since. And let me tell you: now that I’m here looking back, I wouldn’t change a thing.

Looking back (and sealing envelopes at the same time!)

Patience: (The capacity to accept or tolerate delay, trouble, or suffering without getting angry or upset)

Spelling Bees . . . Latin . . . Research Papers . . . Memory Items . . . Foot Ball . . . SPELLING BEES!!! Now, I’ll be the first on to confess that I was lacking in patience at times — especially on Fridays. But I did tolerate a lot of delay, trouble, and suffering in my I.H.M. experience. And, since there are troublesome hurdles in every walk of life, I’m really glad I had the extensive training in this virtue that I got. It was even conveniently worked into my curriculum.

A vicious villain (RBFF melodrama)

The Future: (The time or a period of time following the moment of speaking; time regarded as still to come)

As I already mentioned in my internship presentation three weeks ago, I’m going to begin my adult life in Kansas — where I will become an electrician. A couple of people asked,“ Why Kansas?” So, I’m going to explain my reasoning.

Science Fair

I believe it is prudent for a graduate to buckle down and take things seriously as soon as possible so as not to get caught in that weird “after-school-but-before-life” spell. So, as a solution or precaution against this danger, I’ve decided to jump on in and sink or swim. The drastic change of atmosphere will push me into taking my situation seriously and the lack of people taking care of my needs will make me anything but complacent.

Spelling Bee!

Aside from being a precaution against that “in-between-period”, there are a couple of things calling me to Kansas as well. There is family out there: my brother Tim and his family. This gives me a few advantages — one of which will be to give me a place to stay when I arrive, and Tim and I have a mutual understanding of how temporary the situation will be. Another thing is that Kansas’ living expenses are not as challenging as New Hampshire’s, so this will be an easier start for my initial years of self-support. And last but not least, there is a massive traditional Catholic community out there that I was very interested in seeing for myself. I would appreciate any and all prayers that could be spared for me in this very important transitional period in my life.

Graduating Class of 2010

Gratitude: (The quality of being thankful; readiness to show appreciation for and to return kindness)

When looking back at the whole journey, the primary emotion that I feel is gratitude. I have a great deal of gratitude — not only for the excellent education that I’ve received — but also for all the people who made it possible. The people who taught me, and people who helped me stay on course. And the only way I know how to express my gratitude, is to thank the parties responsible.

Sister Marie Therese: You are a wonderful principal, and you really helped me look at the choices I had to make, concerning my leaving or staying, with a logical mind-set. Thank you; I probably wouldn’t have finished if it weren’t for you.

The fastest boy in school!

Sister Mary Joseph: You taught me for my first year here (which was a very difficult one). I also wanted to thank you for my superior coloring technique and penmanship skills (which are due to your ruthless tutoring).

Brother Louis Marie: You were always a very needed relief during the very trying breaks. You were always there to crack a joke or remind me why I was there. Thank you for consistently elevating my intentions to a higher ideal.

John and Michael ('09) disecting a fetal pig

Sister Mary Peter: You taught me for my seventh grade year, and I’m afraid I was a bit of a troublemaker for you. But more importantly, you were always there to try and calm me down when my frustration built up within me. Some times I would avoid you when I was getting angry because I didn’t want you to cheer me up, but yet, somehow, you always found me. So, thank you for being there to calm the beast.

His real self comes out!

Sister Maria Perpetua: You taught me in both fifth grade and eighth grade, and it was your sweet manner accompanied with your strict discipline that enabled you to teach me so much. Thank you for making me write out the word “would” (as in should & could) eighty times. I can’t help but think of you every time I go to write it.

Professor: I’m glad I had you for at least one of my classes for each of the last six years. You always treated me like you actually enjoyed talking to me, and you were always willing to let me vent. I probably would have gone mad if you weren’t here to help me. Thank you for being more then just my wicked cool math teacher; you were also my friend – in whom I could trust without the slightest hesitation.

What will I do without John in the Blueberry Jammers?

Sister Maria Philomena: Four years straight! I’m not sure what life is going to be like without you for more than a summer. It almost seems like a sloppy divorce. You taught me more than I can generalize. One of the subjects I’m most grateful that I had you to teach me was religion, but there is no way I can express my deep gratitude for all that you’ve done for me. Thank you for giving and giving, day after day. Surely I wouldn’t be the man I am today if God didn’t give be the privilege of having you as my high school teacher.

Mr. & Mrs. McCann (front) at grad party

My parents: You not only paid for my tuition so I could attend this school, but you convinced me to keep on “keepin’ on.” I would like to thank my mother for doing her best to make sure I didn’t throw the opportunity of receiving the excellent education of I.H.M., and my father for teaching me — by example — dogged perseverance

The way I see it, the only way I can give anything back to all the people who gave me so much is to be the best I can be, share all the benefits the school has given me, and there by show the world what a great school I.H.M. is.

Agent 145-and-a-half in "A Case for Two Spies"

I am so glad that I had the privilege of an education at I.H.M. not only for the reasons I stated earlier, but, more importantly, I’ve acquired a dependency on daily sacraments, a habit I plan on preserving even in Kansas.

John with a relic of his patron saint

I can’t pretend to know exactly what my future holds, but, if things go as I would like them to, I will get married (sooner rather than latter), convince my wife to move to New Hampshire, and have many many children. I would be very happy to see all of them attend I.H.M.

Thank you.

Rose Marie Raphael Doucette

[Rose is the second oldest of eight children. She is a member of the National Society of High School Scholars and a recipient of a partial college scholarship from the Knights of Columbus. She missed graduating "cum laude" by only two points -- her cumulative GPA being 86.5 (3.3). Congratulations, Rose!]

Good Afternoon: Brother Andre, Sr. Marie Therese, Sr. Maria Philomena, Dr. Fahey, Mother, Father, Brothers, Sisters, Family, Friends, and Fellow IHM Students. Thank you all for coming! I am here to tell you about something that is very important to me, and to you as well, I hope.

However, before I tell you of that important something, I would first like to tell you of my plans for the future. After I graduate today, my parents and I will be hosting a party at the Winchester Veteran’s Hall. Everyone is cordially invited to attend and enjoy some of my grandmother’s lasagna and a slice or two of graduation cake. There’s also going to be some great music. I hope you can all come!

Now, I will tell you of my plans for my future. I was accepted by two colleges: Magdalen and Thomas More, and I plan to obtain a bachelor’s degree in Liberal Arts. After that, I’m going to try to get into a good Art college, where I can learn how to make children’s movies. I’ve seen a lot of children’s movies to date that are unfit for children’s psychological, religious, and moral growth. I don’t expect to stop the decline of movie morals by myself, but hopefully, if enough Catholic men and women learn the art of animation and other necessary skills [like script-writing and voice acting], we can see the day when better movies and books are circulated throughout American society. This is my most ardent desire, [after the triumph of Our Lady’s Immaculate Heart, of course] of which good entertainment will be an important part.

Graduate of the Class of 2010

Now, I would like to tell you a little bit about myself and my educational quest so far. I’ve lived here in New Hampshire seven – no – ten years: I have been here at IHM from seventh grade to twelfth grade and received honorable mentions only twice. This may seem odd, but even though my grades were, on average really good, I always managed to be deficient enough in one thing or another (like fiddle practice!) that I missed honorable mention. [Rose didn't know it until she got her diploma a few minutes later -- but she made Honor Roll in the fourth quarter of her senior year!]

I have been the winner of the High school division of the Spelling Bee three times. I won first place in the 2009 science fair. I have participated in the Richmond Blueberry Fiddle Festival as both a singer, and a fiddler. In the Blueberry Bake-off, I won three ribbons: one second place ribbon, and two third place ribbons.  But all these things that I have done, I could not have accomplished if it weren’t for the people at Immaculate Heart of Mary School. In fact, if it weren’t for them, there wouldn’t have been any science fairs, spelling bees, or blueberry bake-offs for me.

I mentioned earlier that I had something important to tell you, I am going to tell you about it now. When I moved here, to New Hampshire, ten years ago, I didn’t have any of the things that really matter: neither friends, nor a correct understanding of history; not even a good understanding of my Catholic faith.

Rose with the pumpkin she carved for the Keene Pumpkin Festival

It was a blessing that I wasn’t sent to public school, which my mother frequently reminds me, where I might have grown into quite a rebellious child with an unchecked temper, and a destroyed faith.

As it was, I was already headstrong and rebellious. But underneath my outward bravado, I was actually seeking a peaceful place where my heart and dreams could soar.

My lousy attitude was not my Mother’s fault, she did her best to teach me, but I didn’t want to listen. My mind and heart were so confused that I started shutting everyone out, including her.

You see, when you’re homeschooled, you have no real reasons to leave home; all your classes, learning, and activities take place right in your own house. I could sleep in until ten o’clock, and finish my homework by twelve. I accomplished this by learning to skim the books for only the information I needed to finish my homework. This might seem great to my fellow classmates, but I couldn’t quite retain what I was learning. I simply was not diligent or disciplined enough.

Rose's first science fair

Before long, all of us [except, perhaps, my father who could leave to go to work] — all of us were experiencing a severe case of cabin fever which would not go away. I remember the days when Mother would go shopping, we would all crowd at the door, hoping to be the one chosen to go with her on her trip. Sometimes she took half of us. Other times, she took none of us, needing instead to take some time away from us- and we all understand why!

Days go by so slowly when you don’t have anything truly important to do. I spent my time reading books, visiting exotic and action-packed lands where at least something somewhat important was happening.

An innkeeper (Christmas Pageant)

But I longed for some real friends who I could talk to and who would talk back to me.

I read my entire town library out, but, when the good books were gone, I didn’t have any new places to go, so I turned to the video section of the library.

I watched every movie that my mother would allow, trying to find a way to get to the peaceful land where my heart would be content and joyful. I imagined myself in those places that I found in the movies, speaking to the characters and having many strange and weird adventures, but I knew, even then, that the land of peace was not there.

What a penance - to decorate gingerbread trees during Advent (when you can't nibble)!

Well, one day I heard my parents talking about a small private school that was very close by. It was Catholic, and there was Mass every day. It was a new place to go with many new things to do! I finally pestered my parents into sending me to Immaculate Heart of Mary School, so that I could at least have more people to help me search for my mystical land.

I met many wonderful people here, my friends, my teachers, all the wonderful families; it almost seemed too good to be true. But I was still so very blind, and I was far from recognizing that the entrance-way into my desired mythical land was already opened and waiting. It was waiting for the time when I would find it. But first, I had to learn how to read the signs that would point me towards the entrance, and I had not learned how to recognize them yet.

The Seventh/Eight Grade (Rose and John are in front)

I really can’t tell you how being around good friends can change you, but it did. I found that this small private school was just what I needed. I only ever really got punished once or twice, and then I really deserved it. Of course, for a long time, I couldn’t see much past the new sleep schedule I had to keep: six o’clock sharp every morning.

Rose in the Blueberry Jammers (RBFF 2008)

This was especially difficult for me, because, as you remember, I was used to sleeping in until ten, or even twelve o’clock. The curriculum was difficult for me as well, because I had never juggled so many subjects at one time.

Fridays were a highlight in my week, because two subjects were set aside so that we could learn music and art. These were very enjoyable, fun and easy things to do that didn’t require as much effort on my part. But, gradually I began to realize something important that I had been missing and trying not to think about too much: my religion.

Rose's first Spelling Bee

Being around a group of sisters, I had my first real example of traditional Catholic living. I learned about my faith not only through religion classes where I had many difficult questions answered, but also through the Church’s history and traditions that I had never seen or heard before.

It’s funny how God waits until just the right moment before He lets you realize something wonderful. I began to measure my life to that of the sisters. They were so sure of themselves: so full of laughter and joy and such hope, that I felt ashamed. I tried to sort out why I wasn’t like them, why my life suddenly felt so empty and dull and fruitless, and theirs was full of joy and confidence, and peace.

Laughter is good for the soul

By then, I couldn’t take it anymore; I wanted that peace too, the tranquil, glassy, calm, and silent lake of peace that I saw in them. But I didn’t know how. I read my religion, but I still hadn’t realized its beautiful message yet, the light bulb wasn’t connected to the switch I was toggling, not yet. I knew that heaven was wonderful, but I hadn’t yet realized that it was the only land where there is true peace and happiness: the only land where my searching would be done.

Then, one day at Mass, it happened. I looked at the Host on the altar, and my heart almost broke. I knew that He was there, really and truly, but I didn’t know Him. He was a complete stranger to me.  Yet, my Catholic faith told me that this Stranger

Visiting the Relic Room at St. Benedict Abbey (Still River)

deserves all my love and devotion. How impossible it seemed! Millions of questions and doubts arose like a dark stormy cloud in my mind. Truth seemed to get even further off than ever.

But something inside of me took charge and rallied. I couldn’t see anything through that cloud, but, somehow, I knew that I was not alone. I felt a presence, watching me, waiting for me in expectancy. There was a battle raging in and around me, a battle for my heart and soul, and I was to be the one to decide how it ended. But, how could I? I was too inexperienced and ignorant to know what to do. I sent an ardent plea for help, and was answered almost immediately. The storm ended almost as instantly as it had come, and all my doubts were settled.

After the Auriesville Pilgrimage

Why did God make us? To know, love, and serve Him in this life so that we can be happy with Him in the next life. I had my whole life to get to know Him. What better time to start was there than as soon as possible? That day was the first of many happy days spent here at St. Benedict Center.

Why am I telling you this? Because I want you to know why St. Benedict Center is important to me.  I am telling you about how your school, and by extension, your community has changed me from who I was to who I am. I want you to know how thankful I am, to all of you. This place has effected such a wonderful change in my life, that I almost consider it a second home.

This community has formed not just a school, but a family composed of all the wonderful people who work and support the Catholic faith.

Rose prepares to crown the statue of Our Lady in the chapel (May 2010)

I would like to thank everyone who made it possible for me to come here, and who’ve welcomed me into this family. I’d like to thank, first of all Father DiMascola, and Father Charles Higgins, as well as many of our benefactors who helped to pay for part of my schooling, and gave me another reason to work hard at my studies.

That's some make-up job!

A special thank my good friends: Clare Margand, and John McCann, whom I’ve known since I first came here. You really gave me that companionship I was looking for.

I would like to thank Sister Mary Peter, who was my first teacher, and to whom I apologize for all my antics, but from whom I learned many important things: like diligence. Well, I always meant to put my homework in my backpack, but it got lost somewhere in transit!

Next, I would like to thank Sr. Maria Perpetua, who taught me a lot of church history, and helped me to understand a little more about the way the Catholic Church works in the world. Gratias tibi ago, Soror!

On the USS Cassen Young

Thank you, Sr. Marie Therese, for starting the Sursum Corda Society. I am truly grateful for the books and the medal, and the spiritual help that this small group has given me. I am still trying to remember to return that book I borrowed!

I would like to thank my parents for letting me come to this school and for helping me to remember my homework. Hopefully, you won’t have to worry about the hole in my head for too much longer. And I would like to give a special thanks to my grandma who spent a lot of time and money to come out for my graduation.

On ice!

I would also like to thank Professor Grinstead for teaching me that math is not boring. That’s right, folks! Math is not boring!

I would also like to thank Sr. Maria Philomena, my high school teacher for four years, who was patient with me and my tomfoolery. Remember that one time when Cecilia said a word that supposedly melted wizards and I pretended to actually melt? First, I was dumped out of my seat, and then the desk fell on top of me! Well, at least it got a laugh. I know I couldn’t stop laughing for at least ten minutes after that.

Red & White Roses -- in honor of St. Philomena

{Here Rose presented flowers to Sister Marie Therese and Sister Maria Philomena.}

I would like to thank all my family and friends, and every member of Saint Benedict Center who have not only helped me, but also put up with my oddities and weaknesses. I am honored to graduate from this school!

Thank you!

Table of contents for Mother Love

1. The Christian Training of Children – Early Cares
2. The Christian Training of Children – New and more Difficult Cares
3. The Christian Training of Children – Admonition to Mother
4. The Christian Training of Children – Combating Concupiscence of the Flesh
5. The Christian Training of Children – Combating Concupiscence of the Eyes
6. The Christian Training of Children – Combating Pride
7. The Christian Training of Children – Rewards and Punishments
8. The Christian Training of Children – The Father’s Role
9. The Christian Training of Children – Prayers
10. The Christian Training of Children – Maxims and Sayings
11. The Christian Training of Children – Co-operation with Pastor and Teacher
12. The Christian Training of Children – Catechetical Instruction
13. The Christian Training of Children – Preparing a Child for Confession
14. The Christian Training of Children – Preparation for Holy Communion
15. The Christian Training of Children – Care of Young Adults
16. Mother Love

Little Book of Instructions for Christian Mothers [continued]
(from Mother Love – A Manual for Christian Mothers – by Rev. Pius Franciscus, O.M.Cap., 1926)

On the Christian Training of Children

Chapter XIV – How a Christian Mother Should Assist Her Children to Prepare for Holy Communion.

The next great event in the young life of your child is its first Holy Communion. Until comparatively recent times it was the common practice of pastor and people to postpone this event to a time when the child was considered to be of a clearer understanding, and thus it would happen that children of thirteen and fourteen years had not yet received their first Holy Communion and many had not even made their first confession. Generally a child was not admitted to Holy Communion until it had reached the age of twelve years or had graduated from the parish school. This practice was introduced because it was deemed unwise and even wrong to allow children of a more tender age to approach the Table of the Lord, as they were considered too thoughtless for so holy an action.

But this practice was not at all in accord with the law of the Church, which had been promulgated by the Fourth Lateran Council in the year 1215, and which reads as follows: “All the faithful of both sexes, after coming to the use of reason, shall confess their sins alone to their own priest, at least once a year and devoutly receive Holy Communion at least at Easter time, unless upon the advice of their own priest and for some reasonable cause it should be deemed wise to abstain for a while.” This law was not only approved and confirmed by the Holy Council of Tent, about three hundred years after, but this Council even pronounced anathema on those who hold a contrary opinion: “If any one shall deny that all the faithful of both sexes, who have attained the use of reason, are obliged to receive Communion every year, at least at Easter time, according to the precepts of Holy Mother Church, let him be anathema.”

Therefore, Pope Pius X of happy memory, who deeply deplored the above mentioned custom which deprived children of Holy Communion, though they had attained the age of reason, once more promulgated the old law of the Church and condemned all contrary opinions. Then he also declared at what age a child should be considered as having attained sufficient use of reason for Holy Communion in the following words: “The age of discretion required for Holy Communion is that at which the child can distinguish the Eucharistic bread from common and material bread, and knows how to approach the altar with devotion.” Finally he approved and commanded to be observed throughout the world the following rules:

1) The age of discretion required both for confession and Communion is the time when the child begins to reason, that is about the seventh year, sometimes after, sometimes even before. From this time on the obligation of satisfying the precepts of both Confession and Communion begins.

2)    Both for First Confession and First Communion a complete knowledge of Christian Doctrine is not necessary. The child will, however, be obliged to gradually learn the whole catechism according to its intellectual ability.

3) The knowledge of Christian Doctrine required in children in order to be properly prepared for First Communion is that they understand according to their capacity those mysteries of Faith which are necessary as a means of salvation, that they be able to distinguish the Eucharist from common and material bread, and also approach the Sacred Table with the devotion suitable to their age.

4) The obligation of the precepts of Confession and Communion which rests upon the child, falls back principally upon those in whose care they are, that is, parents, confessors, teachers and their pastor. According to the Roman Catechism, however, it belongs to the father or to the person taking his place, as also to the confessor, to admit the child to First Holy Communion.

5) The pastors shall take care to announce and distribute General Communion once or several times a year to the children, and on these occasions they shall admit not only First Communicants but also others who with the consent of their parents or their confessors, have already been admitted to the Sacred Table before. For both classes several days of instruction and preparation shall precede.

6) Those who have the care of children should use all diligence so that after First Communion the children shall often approach the Holy Table, even daily, if possible, as Jesus Christ and Mother Church desire, and that they do it with a devotion becoming their age. They should bear in mind their most important duty which obliges them to have the children present at the public instructions in catechism, otherwise they must supply this religious instruction in some other way.

7) The custom of not admitting children to confession, or of not absolving them when they have attained the age of reason, is absolutely condemned. Wherefore the Ordinaries, using those means which the law gives them, shall see that it is done away with.

8) It is an utterly detestable abuse not to administer Viaticum and Extreme Unction to åof infants. The Ordinaries shall proceed severely against those who do not abandon this custom.

The foregoing are the instructions of the Holy Father, the representative of our Lord Jesus Christ, who in His name repeats in other words the rebuke of Christ to His apostles: “Let little children come to Me, and forbid them not.” We all have been too stingy in allowing children to get closer to the love of Christ and in union with Him; and it surely was the spirit of Christ that urged the Pope to be the champion o f the little ones. God be praised!

Now, dear Christian mother, after your duty has been so clearly defined by the Father of Christendom, can you hold back in lending your aid to lead that innocent boy or girl of yours nearer to Christ through Holy Communion? Oh, let it not be said, that you are less anxious to have your children in the arms and in the heart of Jesus, than those Jewish mothers of yore, who brought their children to Jesus for His blessing!

Yes, Christian Mother bringing your children nearer, closer to Jesus—this must be the object of all your efforts in promoting their proper education. These efforts must begin early in life. But with the dawn of reason they must be directed towards arousing in your child a deep appreciation of Christ’s love for all of us and, indeed, for each one of us in particular. As has been remarked before, this does not mean that a long elaborate narration of all that Christ did for us is to be told the little one, but it means that, whenever an occasion presents itself, you should use it to give the child a short explanation.

A few examples will indicate to you what I mean. For instance, you are taking your child out for a little walk in the fresh air. (I presuppose here that your child is about four or five years old, and is an average child.) On your walk you pass a church. Like every good Catholic you ought to stop in and pay your respects to our Lord in the Blessed Sacrament and, certainly, you will take your child along. After you have made a devout genuflection and have taken Holy Water and made the Sign of the Cross, which you have your child do also, you will kneel down and make a brief act of faith and adoration of our Blessed Lord in the tabernacle. Then it might be well to lead your child up to the Communion railing and call its attention to the Sanctuary Lamp and explain briefly the meaning of it, that it burns day and night to show the constant presence of Our Lord in the tabernacle. Point to the tabernacle door and tell the child that Jesus is locked in behind that door, because He loves us and wants to be with us always. This might be enough for one time. At some other time you might tell the child that Jesus is there in the tabernacle just as He was here on earth when He lived among the Jewish people in the Holy Land. Again you may tell it how we cannot see Jesus there because He hides Himself under the cover of bread, because we might be afraid of him if He were there with all of His Greatness and Power. Never keep the child in church too long, so that it does not become weary.

In these and similar ways the child should be taught to love the Prisoner of the Tabernacle, so that by the time it starts to school, it may be acquainted with the Mystery of the Holy Eucharist, and may more intelligently follow the instructions on this subject by the priest. Parents that seldom or never direct their children’s attention to this mystery as well as other mysteries of our Holy Faith, need not be surprised if the priest sometimes finds it necessary to postpone the First Communion to a later age than the accepted age of seven years, when every child should have so much understanding as to distinguish good from bad, and the Eucharistic bread from common bread.

But mother should not only be interested in this remote preparation for the child’s First Holy Communion, she must also interest herself in the proximate preparation. As soon as she hears that her boy or girl is one of the privileged First Communicants, she should aid the priest by every means in her power. In the first place, she should add a special prayer to the child’s regular morning and evening prayer to obtain from the Divine Goodness the grace that the child may make a worthy and devout First Communion. An Our Father and a Hail Mary will serve as well as any other prayer, if only each time the Our Father and Hail Mary is preceded by the words “for the grace of a good communion” or some similar words. The following prayer may be recommended for its simplicity:

Prayer for the Grace of a Worthy Communion

O my dearest Jesus, soon I shall be allowed to receive You into my heart. You, O Jesus, Who are my God, my Lord, my Redeemer and Savior. I am glad, because I love You and want You always. But, dear Jesus, my heart is so small and so poor, that it makes me afraid to take in so great a Lord. I wish I could make it as rich and as great as heaven, then, I know, it would be worthy. I cannot make it so worthy. Still, I need You, Jesus, and You want me; otherwise You would not have said: Let the little children come to me, and forbid them not. Therefore I come to open my heart, so that You can live in it forever. Oh, keep it clean and pure and make it rich with Your heavenly Grace, and it will always be a worthy dwelling-place, until at last You will take it with You into Your own happy home in heaven. Help me to be good and to keep me from every sin, even a little one.

O Blessed Mary, Mother of Jesus and my Mother, dear Guardian Angel, Protect and help me. Amen. Hail Mary.

Besides such daily prayer, mother should also drill her child in those fundamental truths which all must know to save their souls These are six, namely,

1)    There is only one God.

2)    In God there are three Persons, Father, Son, and Holy Ghost.

3)    God created all things, and rules and governs them.

4)    The Son of God became man and died on the Cross to save us.

5)    God rewards the good and punishes the wicked.

6)    The human soul will never die, and grace is necessary to be saved.

Then help to get a clear idea into the mind of your child about the Holy Eucharist. This is not so hard, if you will tell the child again and again the story of the Last Supper, and show from Christ’s many miracles how nothing is impossible to the power of God. Tell those miracles also in a child-like way and in deep faith, and the child will soon grasp that under the appearances of bread and wine the body and blood of Jesus Christ does exist in the Holy Eucharist.

As the day of its Holy Communion approaches, mother will do well also to speak of the First Holy Communions of the Saints and of other good, great men, and how they considered no day of their lives happier than the day on which they were privileged to receive into their souls for the first time the Lord of Heaven and Earth. Who will describe the joys of a mother’s and a father’s heart, when their little one in all its innocence and purity of the baptismal graces goes forward to the altar-steps to receive? Many a good father and mother have shed tears of joy and happiness on such an occasion, and surely they experienced at those moments a foretaste of the heavenly reunion in Christ in the next world. Indeed, in comparison to this happiness of having their innocent children united with their Divine Savior in the Holy Eucharist all other earthly joys must seem to them like so much dross and vanity. A warm, sincere faith in the mysteries of our holy religion, united with a supreme confidence in their fulfillment on occasions like the first Confession and the First Communion of their own child, will surely make life’s burdens and trials seem lighter and easier to bear.

After its first Holy Communion mother should frequently recall to the child’s memory the extraordinary grace which it received and strive also to urge it on to keep itself worthy of enjoying the same great happiness even every day. If parents and children would become more devoutly familiar with the Holy Eucharist through frequent and even daily Communion, there can be no doubt that ultimately the peace of Christ would reign in their homes and only rarely would the devil of discord and jealousy and hate gain an entrance there. The Holy Eucharist is the center of life in the Church, and the Holy Eucharist must also become the center of life in every Catholic home, if the principles of Christ are to bring forth there worthy fruits of virtue and perfection.

“Use your discretion and common sense when visiting each site and selecting clothing for your family. I only offer these websites as a service. I do not guarantee the sites, nor do I promise anything about them, endorse them, or recommend any one website [sic] or business over another.”  “  . . . and not all the clothing on each website will pass the Outfit Guidelines, either!” Colleen Hammond

Swimwear

HydroChic (about $70 per piece) – see especially “Breezy Yoke Swim Skirt”            women/teens

Alex and Me ($30-70) – has some options for “swimshirts”

Swim Modest ($50-75) — family business — much better than regular swimsuits, but still pretty tight/short (one piece) – also has a swim shirt for boys/men (www.greatlengthsshorts.com Has knee-length men’s swim trunks)

Simply Modest Swimwear ($15-100) – family business — patterns, material, ready made and custom-made swimwear for girls of all ages (two-piece: leggings/dress)

Wholesome Wear ($60-100) – (one-piece/two layer in three styles, little girls to ladies)

Below the Knee ($44) – one style (looks like a dress)

Lydia of Purple ($22-50, you provide the material and notions) – old-fashioned dress/bloomer combination (can be ordered with a nursing option) **This business is currently for sale & not taking orders**

Lilies of the Field ($47-63) – for girls & ladies (two-piece) – similar to Simply Modest, but looser fit (and shorter sleeves)

Works of the Heart ($57-81) – for girls & ladies (two-piece: swimdress plus leggings)

Modest Kini – A British Web site with lots of options for men & women of all ages (Moslem)

Other Resources for Modest Clothes

Hannah Lise – “Modest fashion without the frump” – really nice clothing for girls & ladies with a very high standard of modesty and quality (a direct merchant – family owned and operated)

4 Modesty – skirts, jumpers, and tops for ladies and teens

Phyllis Jean – clothes for women, young ladies, little girls, and maternity. Made in the US and ready to ship.

Cotton Tops – a British company providing modest blouses & tops

Shukr Islamic Clothing – men & women– a high quality clothing by a company with an excellent work ethic (read their “About Us”) The skirts are particularly lovely and the tunic tops could fix those hip-hugging skirts you don’t want to get rid of!

Yana Nurse Everywhere – an Israeli company with clothing for nursing mothers

Modest Clothing – scarves and ladies’ clothing

Modest Apparel USA – Ladies’ and girls’

Macabi – a fun “transformer” skirt

Dressed in White – white clothing for the whole family            (Mormon)

Custom/Hand Sewn (see also some of the companies under Swimwear)

Works of the Heart – for ladies of all ages; also sells fabric by the yard (and other items)

The King’s Daughters – for ladies of all ages (including slips)

Sew Original (Morman)

Seams Like Yesterday – maternity and baby clothes

Ringger Clothing – clothing for the family (This company works with independent contractors – and also sells patterns)

Modest Seamstress at Modest Prices

Made with TLC

Anna Bouche Christening etc. (Baptismal, First Holy Communion, and other little girl’s dresses)

Formal/Bridal

Modest by Design – Clothing your father would approve of  (Morman)

Beautifully Modest

Eternity

Simply Elegant

and others!

Foundations

ModesTee

Aliza’s Boutique (and clink on Layering Shells, etc.)

Kosher Casual (“Sleevies”, “Teenecks”, “Bolero Shrug”, plus clothes for the whole family — although the women’s/girls’ options tend to be tight/slinky, there is coverage; good for layering)

Funky Frum (Layering Shells, plus other clothing – just avoid the pencil skirts)

Cotton Tops

CoverMeModest (A simple neckline fix)

Patterns

Common Sense Patterns

Ringger Clothing

Baker Lane – Dressmaking & Design            (patterns)

Candle on the Hill – Modest Sewing Patterns            (for the whole family)

Free Period Clothing Patterns

Sense & Sensibility Patterns

Harper House – Vintage Costuming Pattern Catalog

In Timely Fashion (patterns, hairstyles, articles, etc. – a very fun site)

Veils/Head-coverings

Modesty Veils

Modest Clothing

Immaculate Heart Mantillas

She Maketh Herself Coverings

Halo-Works

Plain-n-Simple Headcoverings (Mennonite)

Christian Coverings (Protestant – also has a few clothing options)

Tznius (Jewish – beautiful scarves and also some clothing) For instruction on neat tying designs, click on “How do I tie my scarf?”

Some mainstream companies that include modest clothing in their selections:

Appleseed’s April Cornell Blair Christopher and Banks

Coldwater Creek French Toast Land’s End Orvis

Talbots Travelsmith Vermont Country Store Willow Ridge

[And then, because the questions of modesty-in-dress tends to become a negative series of "do nots", here are a few quotes from winners of the Modest By Design Clothing Company’s Prom Dress Contest. These are teen-age girls for whom modesty is something positive.]

Why I Make the Choice

by Leslie Gerber (Viewmont High, Centerville, Utah)

A wise man once appraised the value of modesty.  He declared, “When virtue and modesty enlighten her charms, the luster of a beautiful woman is brighter than the stars of heaven, and the influence of her power it is in vain to resist.”  The weight that modesty carries is absolutely incredible, but to live modestly is a lot more than just dressing appropriately; it is a living, breathing, principle that demands nurturing and constant attention.  That nurturing comes by the way you live your life; what you say and do, and how you treat others in the world around you.  Modesty shows a person’s love and respect for their God, themselves, and the people they are around.  Although the price of living modestly is difficult to pay, I wouldn’t choose to live any other way.

Dress Like Royalty

by Tomoko Goddard (Orlando, Florida)

You are my child, my princess

Wear the things of royalty

And seeing you wear anything less

In my sight I would hate to see

Cover yourself in holy things

That would be righteous in my sight

Dress like the daughter of a king

For this is my delight

The clothes that you wear defines

How people see and perceive you

To them it is like a sign

Of your should that they can view

Your body is my house

The temple that I live in

Not the color of a blouse

That matters, but the attitude within.

Confidence

by Krista Purser (Murray, Utah)

There is power in confidence.

Confidence is the charisma to draw people in.

Confidence is the assurance to look in the mirror and love.

Confidence is the courage to act on the faith in heart and mind.

Confidence is the ability to change through sheer conviction and determination.

Immodesty is no part of confidence. It is, instead, the mask of confidence, an outward appearance that hides insecurities.

Immodesty is a distraction from the honest beauty of soul and body.

Modesty is courageous. It is, quite simply, laying bare in a different sense. It does not conceal who you are, but instead allows your beauty to shine.

That is confidence: the knowledge of the divinity in the human soul and the belief that who you are will always be enough.

Modesty declares this knowledge to the world.

I owe myself nothing less than that.

For that is confidence.